I’ve recently spent 3 days down in beautiful Rhosilli with Matt Ball working on Lost. Found. Stolen. It was an interesting three days and things seem a bit clearer now on reflection. We spent the time being quite ruthless with the text and what worked and what didn't. We then recorded the fragments that we were happy with and played around with other elements such as music, objects and mapping out chronologically the structure.

We played the game of life .. and I lost!

Matt set me lots of challenges that related to the objects and songs that are important in the show. We numbered the objects by importance and tried different ways of telling their stories. We experimented with layers, combining music, words and physical action. We played around with make up, markings on the body, dressing up and aimed to find the truth between myself as Tracy and Tracy as 'performer.' My favourite moment had to be wearing a curly wig in a mermaid dress with clown make up! (That's most definitely not going in!)

We made a 40 minute show after combining these elements- some of which we won't use, but there were a few instinctive moments that really hit home, physically exhausted me and pushed me to the limit.

So we went for a walk down the beach and talked about how far you go as an artist, when does it become dangerous? when is it just art for arts sake? How you have to reach breaking point to know how that feels and how you re-create that night after night. 

We left Rhossili with a clear idea of elements we were happy with and pieces we wanted to try again and moments that could fit together.

On our return we had a day in a rehearsal room. Some things really seemed to fit and felt right, other things we questioned. Some things we rejected. We started to feel like we had pushed too far to get something 'performative' and lost the original spark that came from my need to tell these stories. A big part of 'me' had been lost. We decided we needed to bring the fun back! 

Part of me is happy that we hit a wall to better understand what we want this piece to be.  I'm glad we have more ideas and are continuing to create, talk and be inspired by the piece. I'm also happy we've agreed on what's working and what's not and I'm looking forward to the break to create, write and have more fun!!