Arise!

Barricades – present day London - Revolution

Jeff: Comrade Ken, what’s the latest from the front?

Ken: Parliament is surrounded, the government are ready to resign and the trade union leaders, police and army have all come over to our side.

Jeff: And...what about the traffic wardens?

Ken: I’m sorry Jeff, they still won’t budge. I’ve never met such self-interested, petty people. We went to their HQ and whilst we stood there talking about solidarity and self-emancipation they sneaked behind us and clamped the van. It’ll cost you £80 quid to get it back.

Jeff: I’m not paying a penny.

Ken: But it’s your van Jeff! You’ll go to court!

Jeff: I mean, we’re on the brink of taking power and running the damn courts.

Ken: Oh yeah, sorry Jeff.

Jeff: It’s nearly midnight. It’s time to send the PM a little note about resigning as soon as possible before we storm the place and remove his options. Where’s my pen? Pen. Pen! The bloody pens I’ve had on this barricade. I could’ve made another barricade with them by now. Where’s stationary Commissar Comrade Doug?

Ken: He, um, called in sick.

Jeff: What? Today? Of all days?

Ken: He did have a bit of a cough on Tuesday morning when we were evicted the Americans from Grosvenor Square and turned the place into accommodation for the homeless.

Jeff: Get him on the phone.

Ken rings Doug. A few words back and forth are uttered. Ken hangs up and reports back.

Ken: He said he felt a bit better mid morning so decided to take the kids to the beach.

Jeff: Oh, did he now?! Fine! Call the whole thing off then. Let’s all go to the sodding beach shall we? We can make sand castles with little red flags in the top. Better still, I’m off to the pub.

Ken speaks into his portable radio.

Ken: All units stand down. I repeat, all units stand down. Operation October 2 is cancelled, repeat cancelled.

© Dean Scurlock 2012