Last month with the support of national theatre Wales I was able to travel up to Birmingham to be able to perform at “Speak Up” an event run by Jodi Ann Bickley. A person who it would be pretty safe to say is one of the reasons I got into writing and performing spoken word.

So I set off looking forward to a long day of trains, but all the time I thought I would use to practise my poems seemed to fade fast as all I could think about is how much of a step up this would be for me as a performer and how drastic it would be if I was to freeze mid poem, or even if any words would be able to come out? So terrified of nerves I managed to get off of my final train a stop to early! This meant I had given myself the luxury of a nice walk to calm my nerves and get my head in the right place for a performance. However for a man who never gets stressed I was doing a surprisingly good job of it.

Fortunately I was able to get to my bed and breakfast in enough time to have a shower and get some form of practise in before I had to leave for what my over active imagination had now changed from a nice night out meeting interesting people to my inevitable doom.

As I was on the open mic list and of course open mics open the night I was feeling thankful for my last name being Thomas and was hoping for it to be in alphabetical order. I had already planned if the person on before me was good I would run through the door or leave via toilet window and no one would be any wiser.

I was not given this opportunity, Jodi called me up first. On the walk to the stage my heart beat stopped and started with every step and my stomach did so many flips I felt like I was about to pass out and then it dawned on me I have no knowledge of the standards of the rest of the audience or performers and questioned myself “Why? What is the point of putting my mind and body through this agony?” But as I started to speak I knew exactly why and that I would just have to do my best and hope that it was enough, and it was. I performed well and a lot of very lovely people congratulated me, I got invited up to perform again and was offered a few sofas to stay on if I ever needed a place in Birmingham but to top it all off I got a autographed book by Jodi and a message inside that said she loved my work!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!