What is the National Theatre trying to do? What is it seeking to achieve with the work that has been created so far? What is the relationship between the PR, marketing, online community and the actual work? We live in a media saturated society, one in which it could be argued that the role of theatre is no longer to compete with the spectacle and speed of delivery of television, film and the internet but instead to strip itself back and desaturate, to allow us the space to think. The media hype that surrounds the shows can, in many ways, only lead to a feeling of disappointment. The images of Shelf life are more spectacular than the reality. Is this the condition of modern theatre, that the means by which we advertise and promote it might promise a more sensationally rich experience than actually exists. In the Old Library we barely had time to breathe and dream it into existence due to presence of the performers. In both the first and second shows the locations haven't comfortably been able to speak for themselves, they have almost been blotted out by the work taking place inside them. There is a very real danger that the National Theatre is an impossible dream, made so by it's ambitions and the very media that it has so brilliantly employed to bring itself into existence. The performances don't yet seem to match the vision.

It's interesting to write in a way that doesn't feel censored. I don't yet feel comfortable in my independence. Too many supervisors with too many ideas of what I should be doing. This is the first step. 43 Days and goodness knows how many entries and this is the first time that I have actually said anything.